The Cows Caused It: A Poem about Global Warming

It's a good thing there are folks like Rep. Dana Rohrabacher of California and Rep. John Boehner of Ohio around to help shed light on who the worst producers of greenhouse gases may be. Who knew it was the flatulence of dinosuars and cows that may have caused climatic changes on planet Earth?

FYI: Some News Links

• Rep. Rohrabacher: Global Warming May Have Been Caused By ‘Dinosaur Flatulence’
• Boehner Cites Cow Farts To Downplay Global Warming (VIDEO)
• Cow Farts: Global Warmers or a Load of Hot Air?
• Cow farts collected in plastic tank for global warming study
• Scientists study cow farts in an attempt to reduce greenhouse gas emissions

On the Flatulence of Cows and Global Warming

The dinosaurs farted.
And now it’s the cows—
Whose anal emissions
Waft into the air
Increasing the greenhouse
Gases “up there.”
In blissful abandon
Cows graze on green grass,
Mooing and chewing
And chewing and pooing—
All the while strewing
Brown pies everywhere.

These flatulent bovines…
These cud masticators…
Digestive polluters …
Toxic gas generators…
These methane producers
Seem harmless and charming.
But I’ve got the scoop—
On the cows and their poop:
They’re the primary cause
Of Earth’s global warming.