Better Duck...It's Dick: A Poem about Dick Cheney's Hunting Prowess

Here are two of my original poems about a Great Moment in Vice Presidential History.

I wrote Better Duck…It’s Dick for Tricia’s Monday Poetry Stretch - Double Dactyl this week.

Do you remember this?
Cheney accidentally shoots fellow hunter: Texas lawyer struck in face, chest with birdshot
From Dana Bash (CNN, 2/13/06)
Click here to read the article.


Better Duck…It’s Dick: A Double Dactyl about Dick Cheney's Hunting Prowess

Eevilly weevily
Richard (Dick) Cheney
Former Vice Prez
And political louse,

Took his pal Harry
Out hunting for wildfowl,
But shot at his good friend
Instead of the grouse.

(Note: I know that Dick and Harry were shooting at quail—but I like the louse/grouse rhyming word pair. Just a little poetic license.)


Here’s another Dick Cheney hunting poem that I posted previously at Political Verses.

A Hunting He Will Go

Who’s hunting here? I think I know.
That’s why I’m certain I must go.
Don’t want to get shot by mistake
Because he thinks that I’m a doe.

I hear his voice. He’s coming near.
Oh, Lord! I know I’ve much to fear.
I best be sprightly on my feet
And get the HELL out of here!

His rifle’s raised; he’s taking aim.
“I’m a human being!” I exclaim.
“Hey! Can’t you see I’m not a deer?”
(Guess he’s decided I’m fair game.)

Forsooth! Alas! He walks my way.
I guess this ain’t my lucky day.
I do not want to be his prey.
I do not want to be his prey.


Click here to view some funny gun/ hunting-themed pictures of Dick Cheney.

A Double Dactyl by Julie Larios

The other day I was inspired to write God, the Goalpost, and Gimme Scriptures: A Double Dactyl after reading Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goal Post of Life: School Board to Meet on Christian Cheerleader Controversy, a post at the blog of Professor Jonathan Turley, a nationally recognized legal scholar who teaches at George Washington University.

Julie Larios, an award-winning poet, read my poem and decided to write her own double dactyl on the same subject. She left her poem in the comments. Julie gave me permission to post it at Political Verses. Thanks, Julie! It’s a clever double dactyl.

NOTE: In order to truly appreciate Julie’s poem, you should read the post at Professor Turley’s blog.


A Double Dactyl
by Julie Larios

Jiggery Pokery,
Warriors are winners!
Boo the Beatitudes,
losers are lame.

Even if we play most
Fort-Oglethorpishly,
God's on our side, kids,
so He'll throw the game.

God, the Goalpost, and Gimme Scriptures: A Double Dactyl

I’m a big fan of Law Professor Jonathan Turley’s blog. Turley posts some very interesting stories. Some of the stories even inspire me to write poetry. After reading the following post at his blog, I wrote a double dactyl—which you’ll find at the bottom of this post.

From Jonathan Turley’s Blog (October 12, 2009): Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goal Post of Life: School Board to Meet on Christian Cheerleader Controversy:


This week, the Catoosa County School Board in Ringgold, Georgia will meet on a controversy over the cheerleaders of Georgia’s Lakeview-Fort Oglethorpe High School who use Biblical verses as part of their displays to root for the football team to “commit to the Lord” and “take courage and do it.”

You can read the rest of the post here.


Here’s more on the story from AOL News: Bible Banned From School Football Field. (It includes a video of townspeople angered by the Bible banning decision.)


God, the Goalpost, and Gimme Scriptures:
A Double Dactyl for the Folks at Lakeview-Fort Oglethorpe High School
by Elaine Magliaro

Higgledy piggledy
Biblical verses
Help us to cheer on
Our team in a game.

God’s “up there” watching
Our fullbacks and tackles.
So if we’re defeated,
The Big Guy’s to blame.

Teatime for Sean Hannity: A Double Dactyl

Thanks to some loony right wingers who have planned a tax protest against Obama, I now know the definition of the term “teabagging.” I was clueless as to what it meant when I first heard clips of folks like Sean Hannity using the term on FOX and when I read news about the planned “teabagging” of the White House on the Internet. Well, now I know what “teabagging” means. Can’t say I was excited to add that new term to my vocabulary. I can guarantee you this: I will NEVER use it in polite company. Heck, don’t think I’ll ever find the need to use it!

Here’s my double dactyl about Sean Hannity who has been one of the folks on FOX who’s been promoting the Tea Bag Parties planned for April 15th. He’ll be down in Georgia today to participate in a “teabagging” celebration in Atlanta. I hope he remembers it's BYOB (Bring Your Own Bag).


Higgledy-piggledy
Sean (Moron) Hannity
Proves he’s an idiot
Nightly on FOX...

Blathers 'bout teabagging
Parties and taxes. He's
Totally (scrotally)
Dumb as an ox.


From ThinkProgress: FreedomWorks Orchestrates ‘Grassroots’ Movements To Serve Dick Armey’s Corporate Clients

Some Videos for You from Countdown & The Rachel Maddow Show
David Shuster: GOP "Going Nuts" For Teabagging, But They "Need A Dick Armey"
Olbermann clobbers Fox sponsorship of tea bag parties
"Tea Bagging" Rallies Ruthlessly Mocked On Maddow Show

A Poem about George Stephanopoulos by J. Patrick Lewis

Today, I have another poem for you written by one of my favorite children'spoets--J. Patrick Lewis.

J. Patrick Lewis

George

By J. Patrick Lewis

Psychophant sycophant
George Stephanopoulos
Traded dark secrets at
Washington’s door.

Now, for the love of those
Mediamegabucks,
Look who the little pimp’s
Calling a whore.

Reminder: I'll be giving away a copy of The World's Greatest: Poems, one of J. Patrick Lewis's books of light verse, as a poetry prize for the second week of National Poetry Month. All you have to do to be eligible for Sunday's drawing is to leave a comment at one of my posts dated April 5-11.

The World’s Greatest: Poems

Written by J.Patrick Lewis & Illustrated by Keith Graves