A Very Cheney Christmas

A Holiday Video from Headzup

Better Duck...It's Dick: A Poem about Dick Cheney's Hunting Prowess

Here are two of my original poems about a Great Moment in Vice Presidential History.

I wrote Better Duck…It’s Dick for Tricia’s Monday Poetry Stretch - Double Dactyl this week.

Do you remember this?
Cheney accidentally shoots fellow hunter: Texas lawyer struck in face, chest with birdshot
From Dana Bash (CNN, 2/13/06)
Click here to read the article.


Better Duck…It’s Dick: A Double Dactyl about Dick Cheney's Hunting Prowess

Eevilly weevily
Richard (Dick) Cheney
Former Vice Prez
And political louse,

Took his pal Harry
Out hunting for wildfowl,
But shot at his good friend
Instead of the grouse.

(Note: I know that Dick and Harry were shooting at quail—but I like the louse/grouse rhyming word pair. Just a little poetic license.)


Here’s another Dick Cheney hunting poem that I posted previously at Political Verses.

A Hunting He Will Go

Who’s hunting here? I think I know.
That’s why I’m certain I must go.
Don’t want to get shot by mistake
Because he thinks that I’m a doe.

I hear his voice. He’s coming near.
Oh, Lord! I know I’ve much to fear.
I best be sprightly on my feet
And get the HELL out of here!

His rifle’s raised; he’s taking aim.
“I’m a human being!” I exclaim.
“Hey! Can’t you see I’m not a deer?”
(Guess he’s decided I’m fair game.)

Forsooth! Alas! He walks my way.
I guess this ain’t my lucky day.
I do not want to be his prey.
I do not want to be his prey.


Click here to view some funny gun/ hunting-themed pictures of Dick Cheney.

Political Pop Singers: Four Couplets

Liz Cheney & Pa
The spawn of Lady Macbeth and her snarly fella
Singing torture songs a cappella


Glenn Beck & Michele Bachmann
Crazy Glenn harmonizes with a bug-eyed chanteuse—
A duo of right wing musical abuse


Shrillo Billo
Listen to his vocal crescendo
And not-so-subtle innuendo


Charles Grassley
“I want choices!” Listen to him croon.
Health care options are a different tune!

Dickie & the Death Squad

DEATH SQUAD

Dick Cheney knew of a secret squad
That did assassinations.
It got the A-OK from him
And flew to foreign nations
To knock off people Dick agreed
Should not be sucking air—
While Dick the Diabolical
Stayed hidden in his lair,
A musky room deep in the earth
Away from prying eyes
Of congressmen and senators—
And also Google spies.


From AlterNet (March 31, 2009): Seymour Hersh: Secret U.S. Forces Carried Out Assassinations in 'a Lot of' Countries, Including in Latin America by Amy Goodman, Democracy Now

From MinnPost.com (March 11, 2009): Investigative reporter Seymour Hersh describes 'executive assassination ring' by Eric Black

From Wired’s Danger Room (July 23, 2008): Why is Google Earth Hiding Dick Cheney's House?

A Hunting He Will Go: A Poem about Dick Cheney

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Vice President Dick Cheney accidentally shot and wounded a campaign contributor during a weekend quail hunt on a friend's South Texas ranch, local authorities and the vice president's office said Sunday. (February 13, 2006)

A Hunting He Will Go
A poem inspired by our former vice president
by Elaine Magliaro

Who’s hunting here? I think I know.
That’s why I’m certain I must go.
Don’t want to get shot by mistake
Because he thinks that I’m a doe.

I hear his voice. He’s coming near.
Oh, Lord! I know I’ve much to fear.
I best be sprightly on my feet
And get the HELL out of here!

His rifle’s raised; he’s taking aim.
“I’m a human being!” I exclaim.
“Hey! Can’t you see I’m not a deer?”
(Guess he’s decided I’m fair game.)

Forsooth! Alas! He walks my way.
I guess this ain’t my lucky day.
I do not want to be his prey.
I do not want to be his prey.