Here's a poem that my friend Pat Lewis, an award-winning children's poet, sent me the other day. Pat is generous about sharing his poetry with us bloggers.
TLC by TSA at LAX
His wand wends its way under my arms,
legs and back. At my groin, it suddenly
keens like a crazed buzzard about to eviscerate
a gazelle. The TSA guard, which I’m told
stands for Total Sensitivity Awareness,
suggests, “Remove your belt, sir.”
My belt, love, my criminal cinch
with the TH for Tommy Hilfiger
metal buckle. But even after the belt’s gone,
the wand won’t let up.
Beow, beow, beow, beow.
I’m ordered into a sunglassed chamber,
asked to lower my Fruit-of-the-Looms.
Oh, babe, here’s where it gets good.
You would have been so proud of me
when I showed them just how little
a threat I am to national security.
If only you had been there, darling,
you could have assured them
they needn’t have bothered.
.JPG)
::choke::
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::giggle::
As funny as the poem is, the reality is pretty sad - especially in light of the fact that one of my favorite actors/authors was down-the-pants groped at the LAX just yesterday. I was distressed on his behalf. People talk a lot about women being upset over this, but it's upsetting to any human being...
Tanita,
ReplyDeleteAir travel sure isn't what it used to be. I was fortunate on my trips to and from Florida last fall when I went to NCTE. I didn't get wanded or patted down.
Yikes! I'm going to make sure I steer WAY clear of LAX.
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