Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Sarah Palin: A Farewell Speech and Poem

I call Palin’s speeches WTF prose (to myself) because I can never figure out the points she is trying to make in them. I find my brain meandering in the morass of her excess verbiage when I’m trying to comprehend what she’s attempting to tell people who are listening to her oral streams of consciousness. I wonder: Does she even have a clue what she’s saying?

You’ve got to see the following video of William Shatner performing an excerpt from Sarah Palin’s farewell speech on the Conan O’Brien Show.

Here's the link: Excerpt from Sarah Palin’s Farewelll Speech performed by William Shatner

Okay…now I get it. Palin’s not writing prose—she’s writing poetry. That’s makes it all clear to me now. Walt Whitman, scooch over! You too, Carl Sandburg! Make room for Sarah Palin in the pantheon of American poets.

Here’s an excerpt from Sarah Palin’s farewell political poem:

And getting up here
I say
it is the best road trip
in America
soaring through nature’s finest show.
Denali, the great one,
soaring under the midnight sun.
And then the extremes.
In the winter time it’s the frozen road
that is competing
with the view of ice fogged frigid beauty,
the cold though,
doesn’t it split the Cheechakos from the Sourdoughs?
And then in the summertime
such extreme summertime
about a hundred and fifty degrees
hotter than just some months ago,
than just some months from now,
with fireweed blooming along the frost heaves
and merciless rivers that are rushing and carving
and reminding us that here, Mother Nature wins.
It is as throughout all Alaska
that big wild good life teeming along the road
that is north to the future.

Click here to read the full text of Sarah Palin’s farewell speech. (Text provided by The Mudflats blog.)

Oh, if only I could write poetry like that!

If I only had the ability
to combine random thoughts
into an incoherent mélange
of mile-long mutterings
that captures the essence
of my poet’s soul.
If only I could
pen poems
with a strong and perceptive hand
about tiny, delicate, vicious little starlets
trying to take away our right to bear arms.
If only I could
write like Sarah does
with heart and estrogenic machismo
about subjects like hunting and skinning big game
for lunch and sustenance.
Oh, to write poetry like Palin!
It’s not politics, I mean…poetry, as usual!

Check out the following post from The Mudflats blog: A Final Bon Voyage from Cordova…

Sarah Palin’s Farewell Speech (Part 1)

Sarah Palin’s Farewell Speech (Part 2)


  1. I wonder: Does she even have a clue what she’s saying?

    I often have the same reaction when listening to our current president.

  2. It is poetic, and it's beautifully written. I have heard a lot of criticism about the speech being incoherent and rambling, but I don't see that at all. I wonder why Sarah haters find it so difficult to understand. It's perfectly comprehensible to me. It was a great speech.

  3. Anonymous,

    I've gotten to the point where I find it difficult to listen to most politicians.


    Why do you assume that I hate Sarah Palin? I have honestly found a few of her speeches to be rambling and disjointed. I call them the way I see them.

    And when Joe Biden speaks, I think to myself how many times is he going to insert his foot in his mouth this time?

  4. I am impressed by our current president's thoughtfulness and find Sarah Palin mindboggling and embarrassing. But entertaining.

  5. T. A.

    Yes, she is definitely entertaining! She has also provided me with lots of inspiration to pen political verses for this blog. I would find it embarrassing if we ever voted her in as president. But why do people assume we hate her if we think she's unqualified to serve in that position?

    What I find mindboggling is the growing number of people in the US who refuse to believe that President Obama was born in the United States!

  6. Glen, I don't see hatred anyplace on this page. I see critique. Actual writers go out of their way to have their work critiqued by their peers.

    You're looking at Sarah's speech the same way my mom looks at my writing. She loves it! Doesn't matter if it's stinky garbage, I wrote it so it must be fantastic.

    Sarah's words are kind of stinky. This does not mean that I hate Sarah. It means she needs to add "Work on My Writing" to her considerable list of Things to Do.

    By the way, I'm enjoying this thread, Elaine!

  7. Andy,

    Thanks for your comments. I do find it difficult trying to figure out what the main points are that Palin is attempting to make in many of her speeches. The speeches lack cohesion and clarity--and jump around from one topic to another.

  8. Shatner's performance was brilliant!

  9. Oh my, "WTF prose." Perfect.

    That Shatner reading was hysterical, as well as your whole post. Thanks!

    Jules, 7-Imp

  10. Mary Lee & Jules,

    Now you'll have to see another clip from a Conan O'Brien Show on which Shatner performs some of Palin's "tweets" as poetry.

  11. Love "estrogenic machoism" and the last line! While reading comments regarding critiqueing Sarah's speeches, a novel critique comment I received came to mind. I paraphrase from memory: it jumps around like a seismograph during an earthquake. (Major changes were made.)

  12. Jim,

    Maybe we could use a "verbal" seismograph to track her speeches.

    I do think it would be an insurmountable task to connect the disjointed thoughts in her speeches...even with super glue!

  13. Thanks for this chuckle! Any time I can see William Shatner reading a "poem" with bongos and a bass playing in the background, it's good for a chuckle!
    Thanks again--

  14. Sylvia,

    I'm glad you enjoyed Shatner's recitation of Palin poetry to the beat of bongos. There are some politicians we hope will never retire because they provide so much fodder for comedians.

  15. Dan Quayle must have breathed a sigh of relief when Palin and McCain lost the election... he could have lost his status as our most SPACEY vice president (everyone wants to be noted for SOMETHING!)

  16. Timoteo,

    Quayle was a consummate speller. Remember how he thought the word potato ended with an "e?" And do you recall how he tried to quote a TV ad--and paraphrased incorrectly when he said that a mind was a terribly thing to lose? (I guess it would be if one had a mind to begin with.)