MARIA: A Song Parody about Maria Bartiromo

I don’t know how many of you saw Mara Bartiromo—aka the “Money Honey” of CNBC—talking with Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY) about health care on MSNBC the other day. If you didn’t see her, you may want to check out the following video. Listen to Maria ask Weiner—a man in his forties—why, if he thinks Medicare is so good, he’s not on the plan! OY! How dumb is dumb?

BTW, I’m working on my new invention—the Bartirometer, a scale we can use to determine just how clueless some of the “talking heads” on TV really are. Of course, Maria would be at the top of my scale, which will give highest scores to the most ignorant individuals.


Weiner Sets Bartiromo Straight on Health Care Reform


Well…after watching Maria in the above video, I was inspired to write a song parody in her honor. Here is my version of Maria—with apologies to Stephen Sondheim who wrote the original lyrics.

Maria…
Asked the stupidest question I ever heard.
Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria…
Her query to Anthony Weiner was so absurd!
Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria…
MARIA!
I just heard a girl named Maria
Say something that’s so dumb.
I think her brain’s gone numb.
Oui, oui!
Maria!
I just saw a girl named Maria
On MSNBC.
She’s clueless as can be…
Ain’t she?
Maria!
Say it loud: She’s the Money Honey
Who’s so ignorant that it’s truly funny.

Maria,
I’ll never stop laughing…Maria!

The most bodacious bimbo I ever heard.
Maria.


Here are the original lyrics by Sondheim:

MARIA

TONY
(spoken)
Maria . . .
(sings)
The most beautiful sound I ever heard:
Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria . . .
All the beautiful sounds of the world in a single word . .
Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria . . .
Maria!
I've just met a girl named Maria,
And suddenly that name
Will never be the same
To me.

You can read the rest of the lyrics here.


Read the following post at TAIBBLOG, Matt Taibbi’s blog at True/Slant: Maria Bartiromo shows us how media has helped sandbag health care reform

And here’s another video for your viewing pleasure:

Matt Taibbi & Maria (The Clueless Money Honey) Bartiromo Discussing Health Care Reform on Morning Joe

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